This probably isn't true but should be. H/T to G-Man, the source of many a joke here.
Whose says cops are not compassionate
Associate Press (AP News)
The Lexington, Kentucky Police Department reports finding a man's body in the Kentucky River just west of the Clays Ferry Bridge. The dead man's name will not be released until his family has been notified.
The victim apparently drowned due to excessive alcohol consumption. He was wearing black fishnet stockings, a red garter belt, a pink g-string, a strap-on dildo, purple lipstick, and an Obama t-shirt. He also had a cucumber in his rectum.
The police removed the Obama t-shirt to spare his family any unnecessary embarrassment.
The Police do care.
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